No matter what kind of relationship we’re in, it’s crucial to stay clear-headed and rational.
Only then can we avoid making foolish decisions that harm ourselves and others.
Whether you’re lovers or spouses, never take the initiative to do these 4 stupid things, once you do, you’ve already lost.
Actively Lowering Your Quality of Life, Suppressing Yourself
Actively lowering your quality of life, suppressing yourself, is a major taboo in emotional relationships.
Diminishing your quality of life includes not only material scarcity but also mental oppression and dissatisfaction.
When we sacrifice our needs and desires to please the other person, we’re weakening our position in the relationship.
For example, giving up a favorite restaurant to save money, or abandoning hobbies to cater to the other person’s emotions.
These acts may seem selfless but actually deprive us of our happiness and dignity.
In the long run, it not only exhausts us but may also breed resentment and discontent in the other person, leading to a rupture in the relationship.
Taking on Everything Proactively, Self-Indulgent All Day Long
Taking on everything proactively, being self-indulgent all day long, is equally dangerous behavior.
In emotional relationships, we should learn to depend on each other moderately, not try to take on everything.
Overcommitting not only overwhelms the other person but also makes them feel you’re not independent and confident enough.
For instance, handling all household chores and childcare responsibilities alone, though seemingly noble, actually strips the other person of the right and opportunity to participate in family matters.
This excessive giving may not only marginalize the other person but also trigger feelings of guilt and avoidance.
We should learn to allocate tasks and responsibilities appropriately, so that both parties feel involved and accomplished.
Giving Up Your Career Voluntarily, No Longer Economically Independent
Giving up your career voluntarily, losing your economic independence, is a foolish choice.
Economic independence is a crucial cornerstone of personal independence and a vital guarantee for maintaining equality in emotional relationships.
When we completely rely on the other person for financial support, we lose the capital for an equal dialogue with them.
For example, quitting your career to focus on full-time family care, while seemingly selfless, actually puts you in a passive and dependent position.
In the face of a marriage crisis or relationship upheaval, it will be challenging to muster the courage and capability needed to cope.
Regardless of when or where, we should maintain our economic independence and autonomy.
Giving Up Learning and Growth Proactively, Slowly Wasting Away
Giving up learning and growth proactively, slowly wasting away, is the most dreadful behavior in emotional relationships.
Learning and growth are crucial paths to personal progress and development, as well as key elements in maintaining attractiveness and charm in a relationship.
When we stop learning and growing, we’re essentially relinquishing the opportunity for self-improvement and change.
For instance, giving up your interests and hobbies to cater to the other person’s tastes, or neglecting personal development and learning opportunities to tend to family duties.
These actions not only make our lives dull but may also diminish our position and value in the other person’s eyes.
We should always pursue and update our knowledge and skills, continuously enhancing our inner cultivation and outward image.
In romantic and marital relationships, we should always remain rational and sensible, avoiding these 4 foolish behaviors.
Only then can we better nurture and advance our bond, creating a brighter future together.
Moreover, we should realize that true happiness and satisfaction come from self-respect and self-care, not from accommodating and sacrificing for others.
Wherever and whenever, we should uphold our principles and boundaries, maintaining our independence and autonomy.